Praising the Positive

I try to make regular positive phone calls home to my students' parents, especially those that tend to cause problems and regularly get negative phone calls from the school. I made two such phone calls today. 

The first call, the student thought it would be hilarious to call his mother and pretend that he'd gotten into trouble again in class. I didn't think this was a great idea, but his mouth was moving before I could even think to tell him otherwise. So he hands me the phone and I remind her who I am and I can tell she is very displeased. I just couldn't go along with his plan and told her how awesome her son had done in class today. She started cracking up! Apparently this kiddo knows his mother's sense of humor better than I expected - either that or she was just so relieved she didn't know what else to do. After she was done laughing, she thanked me about 5 times for calling on a good day.

For the second call the student just couldn't contain himself and his mouth was moving so fast I don't know how his mother understood a word he had said. But at some point he did hand me the phone and I informed her what a great day her son had today and how genuinely proud of him I was. This mother reacted differently. Her voice started to shake and crack as she thanked me about eleventeen times and I thought she was going to cry right there on the phone. She then asked me to hand the phone back to her son so she could also tell him how proud of him she was. Poor kid sat there while his mother obviously gushed all over him on the phone, his face getting more and more red, but he was very clearly happy to have made his mother proud.

Teaching middle school is hard folks, but being the parent of a middle schooler is also hard. They've gone from elementary school where everything is in one place and the whole class goes everywhere together to middle school where they have to be responsible for everything - going class to class, managing homework, learning to open a locker, changing in the locker room and so much more. And as a parent of a middle schooler all you can do sometimes is hold on tight to those often few and far between positive moments and hope for the best on the other side of puberty. 

The two mothers I spoke to today definitely needed some positive moments with regards to their own sons and I was so glad I could provide that for them. Those phone calls not only boosted the kids, but it made the day of the mothers and made me smile. On top of this, the next time one of these boys acts up in my class I will most certainly have the support of these mothers when trying to rein in the boys. So, why not try to find some posiitivity in a place where there is usually only negative and sing it's praises? You never know when that will come back to you - it usually comes back to me when I need it most. 


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